I learned to have a sense of humor about the nephrostomy bag that was attached to me for 2 weeks. I learned I was capable of waking up at odd hours during the night to empty it. I learned it had many colors. Purple from the dye mixed with blood, red from blood, yellow from dehydration and orange from a medication. I said I could almost pee a rainbow. I learned how to camouflage it inside pants and how to attach it with a safety pin so I could work each day without anyone asking questions. I learned how to wrap myself with a trash bag pouch for it so I could shower. It went everywhere with me to church, a Christmas dinner under a skirt, grocery shopping, the bank, in uhaul trucks, etc. Three weeks ago the radiologist said he'd be replacing the stent and removing the bag. The radiologist asked if I could turn onto my stomach for the procedure and I said I'd do my best, but wasn't sure that was an obstacle I had trained for. My friend Emily brought me home from the hospital once again and would spend the next hour helping me through bouts of pain and nausea as she gently massaged my back.
The last three weeks have been difficult ones. I haven't felt well, but I've tried my best to still do my job. It helps me focus on other priorities.
I was able to go to Santa Barbara for a short trip Christmas Day and was so thankful to spend time with Patty and her family. I got JT and Chandler both white elephant style gifts this year but they both loved their boxer underwear.
I've had a doctor appointment, a trip to the ER again, another doctor appointment where I'd learn test results from the ER came back showing a staph infection and another stent exam got scheduled for tomorrow. I seem to have also caught the winter cold and I wish I was talking temperature. I said my poor nose was the only thing running, but at least part of my body still can. I really truly look forward to the day I can run again.
There have been times throughout this that I have been scared and times like yesterday where I was upset and cried a lot. My co-worker often reminds me crying is okay. I asked my "always good" friend what his trials and struggles have taught and he simply replied,"you keep going."
Tomorrow is New Years Eve and I have no idea what the day holds other than a test at a hospital I haven't been to yet. I'm glad I have the same radiologist because I like his repoir. I will try my best to keep going all the way into 2015. I only have one event on my calendar for the New Year and its 30 hours long and in May. I'd like to think this is my SISU IRON preparation and when I am in the midst of those 30 hours at that event I can remind myself that there was a time where I learned to get comfortable with a nephrostomy bag attached to me and I could pee rainbows.
The last time the bag was attached to me
A pleated skirt camouflaged the bag
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